At Times I Almost Dream
by Maribor
Summary: Sequel to "Against A Sea of Troubles" Data finds himself in a universe that is not his own. He must learn to deal with an existence he never imagined and a second chance he never wanted.
1. Chapter 1

**_"I give the fight up: let there be an end, a privacy, an obscure nook for me. I want to be forgotten even by God."_ -Robert Browning**

**At Times I Almost Dream**

The strangest thing was not the fact that he woke up on the flat table, in the unfamiliar setting. It was not the fact that he was in a controlled environment with a series of bright lights aimed at his body. It was not even the fact that he found himself restrained. The strangest thing was that he woke up at all.

Data's confinement allowed him no movement and the only sensory information available to him was what his eyes and ears afforded. His environment seemed sterile and calm, not what he would have expected from a supply ship doing an illegal, flyby pickup. He did not hear the expected hum of engines or even his mother's argumentative tone bargaining with the captain. Everything was too quiet, too clean and too still. It was all disconcerting and frightening and the longer he lay there the more agitated he became. Somehow he had failed in his endeavor, he was alive and as he was unable to move, as best he could tell, meant his chances for continuing survival were slim. All of these facts made him incredibly despondent. He turned his emotion chip off.

Off to his right Data heard the distinct sound of someone clearing their throat. Up until that moment he was certain he was alone.

"Excuse me," Data called out to the unseen person. "Am I to assume, sir, that you are the Commanding Officer of the _Abraxis_?"

His question was followed by a surprised, choked cough and then the sound of feet hurrying over to him. A face came into Data's sight line. A human male, mid forties, dark hair and wearing a look of absolute amazement on his face. He sniffled, began to speak but apparently felt another cough approaching and turning his head cleared his throat loudly.

"Data?"

"Yes, that is my name. And yours?"

"Bruce Maddox, but just call me Bruce."

"And you are the Captain of this vessel?"

"Vessel? Well, yes I am a Captain but we aren't aboard a vessel. We're aboard a space station. Data…what do you remember?"

Data found the question far too leading and vague. He decided not to answer.

"I can only assume am I a prisoner here. A captive, because my mother neglected to tell you about an extra passenger, my sister. Let me assure you, holding me for ransom would be a useless endeavor. There is no one to pay you in addition to that once the Alliance became privy to the transaction they would more than likely imprison and execute you."

"The Alliance…" Maddox said before coughing into his sleeve. "You'll have to excuse me Data. I have a nasty case of the Bolian flu." The man pulled a nearby stool over and sat down. "You're not a prisoner here, Data. Quite the opposite. You're a free man. I know you don't know me but…in a way we're old friends."

Data wrinkled his brow in naked skepticism.

"Forgive me, but restraints do not appear to be the most logical way to begin or continue a friendship. I am also certain we have never met." A though suddenly occurred to him and he added; "Do you have a system of laws here?"

"We are governed by laws, yes."

"Am I to be put on trial?" Data asked with a rather disingenuous calm.

"Is there something you've done that you feel you should be tried for?" Maddox asked with surprise. When Data failed to answer he continued. "Actually you were tried in a manner of speaking. There was a ruling, you were in absentia-"

"What sort of ruling?" Data asked unable to keep the concern from his voice.

"A ruling to determine your rights and place here. It was decided you should be afforded all the rights and privileges of a Federation citizen. In addition to that it was ruled that because of your very nature and pending certain uploads and tests you could even return to your rank and position."

Very little of what Data was hearing made sense and his attempts to process it were sluggish. An internal diagnostic revealed some systems were offline, others having been booted but only in safe mode.

"Have you been attempting to alter my systems?" Data asked vaguely horrified.

"Yes," Maddox replied nonchalantly. "You were completely offline when you were delivered here. It's taken me a long while and there were times I feared the damage to your neural cortex may have been too extensive but as usual I underestimated your recuperative abilities. I have to apologize for the restraints, Data." He said before disappearing from the androids sight line again. Data felt the disturbing sensation of the man performing several quick operations through his cranial port. Suddenly several systems came back online and safe mode blocks disappeared. He gasped audibly as he immediately felt whole again and a moment later the restraints too vanished.

Maddox returned still looking apologetic. "I've been doing some rather sensitive work and while you're almost identical to-…well I wanted to know the moment you regained consciousness but I also needed to make sure you remained completely immobile."

Finally able to move Data sat up and swung his legs off the side of the table. Maddox pushed back bit on his stool and they both regarded one another.

"You are an engineer?" Data asked.

"Yes, an engineer, a cyberneticist and I also hold the Daystrom Chair of Robotics."

"You seemed quite skilled in handling my specific systems. I can detect no anomalies or damage and if I was a severely injured as you claim I appear to be no worse for wear now." Data stated all this with quiet amazement.

Maddox bowed his head modestly and answered simply; "I've had a bit of experience. There's actually a more that I'd like to do, Data, if you don't mind. A couple of system tweaks but only with your permission." The man coughed hard again before continuing. "I want to emphasize you are not a prisoner here Data, the truth is you are totally free to walk out that door, no one will stop you. But we have a lot to discuss and I hope you'll stay. I have so many questions and so does Starfleet. But again I offered to be your liaison with them, its one of the things I fought for during your trial."

"You were my advocate?" Data asked.

"I was, I even got this damn cold from the Bolian JAG." Maddox said with a chuckle.

"You mentioned a 'Federation', I am unfamiliar with such an organization. Has there been a shift in power in this section of the galaxy? Precisely how long was I unconscious?"

"A little over two months. As for what the Federation is, I think it may be best if you discover that for yourself. I have quarters set up for you here and I've virtually taken up residence myself."

"Sir, where is my mother?" Data asked tentatively physically bracing for the reply.

The other man sighed. "I'm no counselor, Data but…" Maddox extended a hand and placed it in what Data identified as a gesture of comfort on his knee. "She died, Data. From what I understand the _Paracelsus_ came upon your ship, it seemed to be phasing in and out of time. They locked a transporter beam on but another beam from an undetermined source did the same. It started a sort of tug of war and they attempted transport a few seconds too late. I know this is hard to hear."

Data's mouth twitched, he hoped imperceptibly. It was impossible to comprehend, it was something he had never truly run the calculations on before. She was dead. He was alive. At first he felt, even in the dim haze of being without his active emotion chip, a sense of happiness, relief. He had never anticipated surviving while she perished. But that was quickly replaced by a sense of shame and disgust with himself. He had put all this in motion so neither of them would continue, so both evils would die. This was not right. This was not a reprieve his conscious matter-of-factly informed him, this was punishment.

"We have her stored here in cryo. We weren't sure what sort of arrangements or plans you might want to make but we wanted to give you the opportunity to decide."

"Jettison it." Data replied before he could stop himself.

"I'm sorry?" Maddox said looking a bit aghast.

"The corpse, you may jettison it if you wish or dispose of it in whatever manner this Federation sees fit. What is my sisters condition?"

"Data, do you have an emotion chip? Is it functioning?" Maddox asked peering at him quizzically.

Data was shocked to hear such an intimate question asked so casually. He assumed the man had discovered the chip during his repairs. Though he bristled slightly at the impropriety Data chose to answer nonetheless.

"I do have an emotion chip but it is currently not activated."

"I could have sworn-"

"My sister?" Data asked interrupting him purposefully.

"I confess I've been focusing all my efforts on you and I haven't allowed anyone else to touch her. I admit I gave her a brief once over when she arrived and discovered her systems are incredibly advanced, more advanced than yours if you'll forgive me for saying. I didn't even want to attempt any work on her until I felt confident you were 100%, not to mention I thought I could use your help. But before any of that there's something we need to discuss."

Data fleetingly wondered what more could possibly be revealed.

"Do you know where you are right now, Data?"

"As you told me I am aboard a Starbase. I assume somehow we much have traversed past the reaches of the Alliance. Though I fail to understand how, that may be the most likely explanation. This appears to be a Terran stronghold of some sort. The Bajoran who was coming back for my mother, sister and I mentioned a rebellion. I can only assume you and other individuals here are part of that rebellion, a regrouping of humans to overthrow the Empire."

Maddox smiled and nodded slowly. "A reasonable conclusion. But I think you may find the truth even more far fetched. I assume you're familiar with theoretical quantum physics?"

Data nodded prompting the man to continue.

"For centuries scientists had theorized that there may be alternate timelines and realities running concurrently with ours, sometimes even intersecting. The 20th century physicist Hugh Everett maintained that whatever can happen does happen."

"I am familiar." Data said. His mind was of course able to process this information rapidly but hints and residuals of emotions seemed to be stunting obvious mental progress. "Are you saying, sir, that I am not in the reality to which I am native?"

"Your quantum signature is distinctly different from mine or that of anyone else's here. We're not sure how this happened, it may be a combination of the ion storm I understand you ran into, your shuttle's core breech and dueling trans-universe transporter beams but somehow you, your sister and your mother were brought here, to our universe." Maddox looked at him, concern etching his features. "Are you all right?"

No one save his father had ever asked him that before, it was strange to hear it. _Was_ he all right?

"I am simply processing the information you have given me." He replied with uncertainty.

"I'm afraid we've only reached the tip of the iceberg." Maddox said. "Come with me, Data." He said rising from his stool and placing a hand on Data shoulder.

Data rose as well and followed the man silently taking a long look at the lab and the equipment therein. Suddenly he was struck with the idea of turning a corner and seeing his sister lying unmoving on a slab and goosebumps rose up on his flesh.

"This part of Daystrom is a secure facility. It comprises my secondary office, my laboratory and my living quarters. Now when I sleep, _if_ I sleep its always in my office, the quarters are virtually untouched." Maddox was leading him down a long hallway, past smaller labs filled with computers and diagnostic equipment. Finally they stopped in front of a closed door. Maddox coughed again and sniffled as he quickly used the adjacent keypad and after inputting a series of numbers the doors slid open. "I hope you'll find everything in here to your liking. I realize it's rather spartan."

Maddox stepped inside and Data followed. The quarters were expansive and functional and the idea that this space could belong to him, albeit temporarily was a bit shocking. Living with his parents had afforded him no privacy, and it was not until now when it was presented to him that he realized it was something he craved.

"I'm not sure what your habits are but there's a bed, a bathroom, sonic shower, brand new replicator, they just upgraded it last week as a matter of fact. And um…" Maddox walked over to a computer work station and brought it online. "Right now you have a level 2 security clearance, I realize its not that high, about the equivalent of cadet but it will allow you to access basic Starfleet records, I assume you'll want to familiarize yourself with history first. You have a few hundred years to catch up on. Is there anything you want to say, anything you want to ask me?"

"Not at this juncture, no. I believe these quarters will be more than adequate. Thank you." Anticipating that Maddox was about to leave Data switched on his emotion chip. Almost immediately he became fed up with the mans presence, he wanted time by himself to think. He was alive and he did not wish it. He was in a strange place where his 'captor' continued to state how free he was though he saw no evidence of it yet. He began to run circular diagnostics suddenly distrustful again of the mans work on his systems. He thought about his sister and felt something akin to depression sweep over him. Nothing had tuned out as it should have, nothing.

Maddox broke into a smile.

"You're more than welcome, Data. Like I said, you're a free man, I'd just like to make sure you aren't having any further issues. After you study up a bit we'll have more to talk about. Okay, if you have any questions you can ask the computer, call me over the comm. system or just walk out and get me."

Data nodded his eyes shifting towards the waiting computer as he found himself eager to get started.

Maddox seemed to be waiting for something and Data turned his gaze back towards the man.

"Was there something else, sir?" Data asked with tight impatience.

The other man made an awkward advance toward him, his arms were bowed a bit as if for…_an embrace_? Data noticed his eyes also seemed a bit damp, his cheeks flushed. This could all however easily be caused by the illness the man appeared to be battling. Finally he dropped his arms and instead just extended his hand to the android. He seemed to be requesting a handshake and Data grudgingly obliged.

"Data it's…it's really good to see you."

Unsure of how to respond to the mans emotional display, Data only nodded. Perhaps he had simply become invested in him and was overcome with seeing him up and functioning. It was curious no doubt and he intended to examine it later but for now he was more concerned with knowing exactly where and when he was. Maddox made a hasty exit following the handshake and Data was left alone. Seating himself before the terminal he spoke.

"Computer, please access all historical records regarding; The Federation."


	2. Chapter 2

**A couple things to note here. I took a few liberties regarding timeline. Memory Alpha states that "****A cut scene from (****ENT****: "****In a Mirror, Darkly****") has Archer invoking the blessings of "the gods", hinting that the Empire may be a continuation of or successor to the Roman Empire. ****Marlena Moreau****'s mention of ****Kirk**** becoming a "Caesar", would add support to this notion, as may the fact that "Terra" is the Latin word for "Earth"." I chose to go with that theory. Memory Beta also has Bruce Maddox as a Commander and the Associate Chair of the Daystrom Institute in 2265. I've bumped him up to Captain and Senior Chair. OK, that's all, as always please read and review. Let me know what you think.**

_ "The value of the sword is not that it falls, but rather, that it hangs." _

Wake At Length From Weary Dreams

He was aboard a shuttle that much was obvious. Trying to shake the feeling of disorientation he began to look at the console before him in search of a plotted course, a current position, anything to tell him where he was and where he was heading. However nothing on the instrument panel made any sense, the buttons, the language, the configuration it was all indecipherable.

"I cannot pilot this ship." He said softly.

From overhead a klaxon began to blare, the console flashed an angry red but the viewscreen revealed nothing. All right, from what he could determine what served, as scanners for the vessels were detecting nothing. If it was not a proximity alarm, then it must be a systems malfunction. He looked at the flashing lights and nonsensical words and design before him and felt a sort of helplessness sink in. The alarm seemed to grow louder and louder finally reaching a volume that could hurt even his ears. In desperation he started pressing buttons, making wild assumptions as to what this or that might do. Finally when he could bear it no more he put his hands to his ears and began to shut his eyes. Before they were fully closed something moved across his field of vision.

And then the alert stopped. Silence filled his ears nearly as loud as what it had replaced. Slowly he opened his eyes and found the console before him, every button and function key to be the calmest blue no longer the intimidating red. Nothing was flashing; nothing seemed to require any immediate attention, the words still made no sense and nothing looked anymore familiar yet he felt incredibly relieved.

Suddenly aware that he was not alone, as he had first thought he turned to his right. There on helm control sat a young man. The stranger didn't acknowledge him but instead had his legs crossed and outstretched, his feet resting on the navigational system before him. He had both of his hands folded behind his head, interlaced as he stared out ahead of them.

Was this his ship? Surely the strangers movement had been what he'd witnessed as his eyes were closing. A furtive gesture that satisfied whatever the spacecraft had been demanding.

He opened his mouth to speak but the young stranger, still in profile beat him to it.

"The mind is a funny thing isn't it, Data? The moment you fall asleep all the necessities, all the things we demand when we're awake go right out the window. Plot, theme, reason, logic all get sacrificed on the altar of the subconscious.

When I was a boy, my mother had a garden. Now, in the daytime except for shooing away stray rabbits and squirrels I found the whole thing rather boring. But at night I would sometimes sit there, legs folded beneath me and watch as that garden came alive. First the soil would shift a bit in these small places here and there. Then the worms would push their way to the surface, then the grubs would appear. Finally all the many-legged creatures that find refuge and sleep in the dark and dank places during the daylight would emerge as well. And I would sit there and watch and marvel as only a little boy can. That's what our minds are like when we sleep, Data. Everything we thought was hibernating decides to slither out and say good-evening."

The stranger turned to look at him and while Data had never truly seen him so young he knew at once it was his father.

"Did I ever tell you that story, Data?" he asked his eyes blue and alert without the slightest hint of pain or of wits blunted by age.

"I do not know." Data answered. "I am having difficulty accessing my memories."

"Ah well." Noonien said with a shrug. "It was a good story nevertheless. I wonder if it's true or if your subconscious just made it up? Like I was saying son, the mind is a funny thing especially when you're asleep. Suddenly, we have no patience for exposition." Noonien quickly adjusted his body putting his feet on the floor and swiveling his chair to face Data. He leaved forward and held his hand flat before his sons face, palm side up. With his other hand he took his pointer finger and aimed directly above the center of his outstretched palm.

"You see, Data when you dream, you dream from the center out." He said as slowly began to make a lazy and widening spiral on his palm with his first finger. Data watched, feeling slightly entranced by the small action. "You start at the center and work your way out. You figure out your purpose, your point, your reason for being here as you spiral outwards. You have to move away from the center because the center does not hold. The center cannot hold."

"I am unable to grasp your meaning, Father." Data answered regretfully.

Noonien sighed and dropped his hands into his lap.

"You've never used this program before, Data, why?"

"I had no desire to do so until now."

"Why now?"

"I thought there might be something to be gained."

"Mmmm. Instead we're in the most mundane of situations. Doesn't seem like a very sharp learning curve, eh son?

"So, where are we going?" he asked turning away from his son.

"I do not know." He responded feeling slightly embarrassed. "This configuration is unfamiliar to me."

"Aren't you wondering why there are no stars?" Noonien asked gesturing to the viewer before them. Indeed everything was an inky black.

"Father, if you are saying all of this to prove that I am dreaming, I will not dispute that fact." Data said patiently.

"No? Good." Noonien said with a smile Data found…unsettling. "So you understand I'm just an extension of your subconscious and that the console gibberish combined with the two of us currently en route to a void of nothingness represents your feelings of confusion, loss, pain, depression et cetera?"

"I had surmised as much."

"Great. That covers everything you think of when you think of me. So why is she here?" Noonien asked hooking a thumb behind him in a gesture that directed Data's gaze to the rear of the compartment.

Data gasped and pushed back in his chair as far as he could go. Not feeling it to be quite far enough he stood pressing his back against the wall.

There sat his mother grotesquely propped up in the aft section seats. A good portion of her steel gray hair was burned off, some of it melted to her skin. Her face was smudged and bloody in the places where it wasn't completely charred black. Her clothing was singed and torn, her were eyes closed and her mouth hung open slack and lifeless.

Noonien too had turned to gaze at her but his manner was far more appraising.

"Now that's a hell of a thing to be carrying around with you, huh?" he said almost cheerfully.

"I do not want her here." Data responded his voice nearly muted by his horror.

"Well that _is_ and _isn't_ true." Noonien said rising and heading to the rear of the shuttle. He took a seat next to his wife seemingly oblivious to her condition. "Your conscious mind may not want her here, may want to purge every single memory of her from your systems, may want to forget what you did to her." Noonien continued with a negating wag of his finger. "But we're not in the domain of your conscious, this is your subconscious and here anything goes!"

"You should not…" Data began and then faltered.

"What? Not sit so close?" Noonien asked and then rested his head upon Juliana's shoulder adopting a syrupy smile. "Don't we make a cute couple?" he asked before bursting into wild laughter.

"Why are you behaving this way?"

"I don't know, you tell me? It does seem incredibly out of character doesn't it?" Noonien rose quickly, quicker than Data had ever seen in real life. He approached Data and they stood identical nose to nose.

"You know what I think, Data? I think the reason you're here by yourself in a shuttle to nowhere that you can't pilot with only a ghost and a corpse to keep you company is because you feel guilty."

Data attempted to back away but there was truly nowhere to go.

"You feel guilty because you let me die and you murdered her."

Data's eyes widened in horror as the weight of his father's words fell upon him.

Noonien nodded theatrically and drew out the words and he continued. "Yes, I suppose my death could just be chocked up to negligence. But Juliana, I asked you, begged you to leave her to heaven, and to those thorns that in her bosom lodge to prick and sting her. But you killed her, premeditated, cold-blooded murder. But maybe it didn't feel all that cold after all did it, Data?"

Noonien had him pressed against the pod wall now. Logic having abandoned him now Data felt small and helpless. His father, his face unmarked by time, his grin savage his eyes sharp seemed to tower over him offering no exit.

"It felt hot, didn't it son? It felt powerful and raging and you know if you had veins they would have been throbbing in anticipation with what you planned to do."

"I did not relish it." Data lied.

"Come on, son." Noonien said harshly. "You should be smarter than this. You are literally lying to yourself and I ain't buying it."

"I wish for this dream to be over now." Data said struggling push away from his fathers form but with a hand on his chest Noonien held him easily.

"I know what you're thinking. You're thinking this whole trading universes thing is a second chance. Well let me tell you, there are no second chances, son. What you did _happened_. Nothing can change that. Making a mistake that big, well it follows you. Like spilling ink on linen, you can scrub and scrub and scrub but it will never come out and it's only going to spread and make your hands dirtier in the attempt."

Noonien suddenly stalked away from him back to Juliana's body. Without looking he swiftly put his hand on the nape of her neck and lifted Juliana to her feet. Data didn't have long to be shocked by the strength his father demonstrated as a new disbelief took over when his mother opened her eyes. Not dead after all.

"And murder, Data, a stain like that is going to bleed, bleed right across timelines."

Juliana began to sputter and cough struggling vainly in Noonien's grip. Data tried to shut out the pleas as she begged for her life.

"You can't slip out on fate, Data." His father said before adjusting his grip on Juliana. With one palm on the crown of her head and the other on her chin he stood behind her. "Hush." He said softly, soothingly while pressing his cheek against hers.

"Son, I'm sure you were expecting some sort of message here, some guidance, perhaps even absolution? But I'm afraid that's not how this works. Sometimes Data, a dream is just a dream."

With one sharp movement and a cracking sound Data found revolting he snapped Juliana's neck. Her eyes went wide, then dulled as Noonien let the body fall to the floor.

For the first time ever, Data woke up screaming.

**Personal Log Stardate 56982.7**

_At Captain Maddox's request I have begun keeping a journal to record my experiences during this time. He feels it will have a certain relevance in the future as well as serve as a cathartic exercise for me at present. I confess to having my doubts. He has also stated the contents will be kept private unless I were to authorize their release. I have no reason to doubt him per se nor any reason to anticipate the desire to make my private thoughts public._

_I have been at this facility for fourteen days now and have exhausted the limited records of the Federation I have been presented with. The date of timeline divergence is unclear but one thing is for certain, it occurred over two thousand years ago. In my universe the Terrans still believed in the gods. The Terran imperial ways threaded their way throughout Earth's history snaking its way through revolutions, movements, coups, assassinations, hiding, reemerging until its time finally came round. A grassroots organization grew into a political movement, then a party, then the ruling party; they waged the Third Great World War and were instrumental in attempts to unify the human race. After that, they became global all subsequent events leading up to that fateful evening of First Contact._

_Events in this universe did not follow the same course. This Federation would have more than likely been called a fools paradise in my time. Over 150 worlds, united under one flag without the threat of tyranny or subjugation. Hundreds more non-aligned but friendly civilizations. Bajor aligned with this Federation. An alliance with the Klingon Empire. Opening talks with the Cardassians. It is all so drastically different I find it nearly impossible to believe._

_Captain Maddox has by laborsome petition convinced me that Starfleet is not in fact a military regime and has no invisible arm ending in an iron fist. My suspicion appeared to grate upon him as he eventually said; "My goodness, Data its as if you're hoping something will be wrong!" I responded that I was not and that I was in fact simply attempting to learn all that I could. I think perhaps now that I may have told a falsehood. I do not trust this world as it has been presented to me. I do not trust the freedoms that I am said to possess. I do not trust the fact that I am free to leave this facility if I choose. I do not believe a world that has abolished poverty; hunger, money, greed, apathy and evil can truly exist. I still suspect things are being kept from me. Items, names, places have been redacted in the records Captain Maddox provided. Why? What is being hidden? Yet I hesitate to ask as I too am keeping secrets._

_Now that he has completed the repairs to my system I have begun urging Maddox to shift his focus to my sister. Indeed he has asked me many questions about her creation and development but I have yet to be allowed to see her. These are the reasons I do not fully trust him. Though he purports to be my "friend" and seems at times to be attached to me I confess I feel no such connection. I feel no different here than I did in my father's lab, trapped, studied, hidden away._

_I have been keeping my emotion chip online for much of these two weeks as I have decided I must learn to function with it. I have also discovered that emotions make firm decisions much less firm when burdens grow too heavy. In fact, if these dreams persist perhaps I will turn it off after all. I am subjected to nightmares nearly every evening, each one more disturbing than the last. I have little desire to explore their significance and have chosen to recount them in this journal in third person as it affords me a much needed disconnect from the events._

_I sometimes find myself still wishing I had perished in the shuttle all the while preparing to carry on. My 'father' is correct, I too do not believe in second chances. I know this is not over. I know there is a judgment waiting for me. My thoughts are turned increasingly inward and I have come to understand depression. I have a lingering feeling that a sword of sorts hangs above my head. Some rough beast is on the horizon; something is yet to be revealed. _

_I am afraid._


	3. Chapter 3

So this one was awhile in coming. For some weeks there I felt a bit like I lost the narrative thread. Plus I had a decision to make at the end of this as to whether I'd bring in a certain original character with ties to an established one. I may regret it but I bit the bullet anyways. Ok the quote is from Samuel Beckett. Fair warning not a lot happens in this chapter (Can I sell it or can I sell it?) but I am trying to set some things up. Ok, as always please read and _**review**_. I subsist only on your critiques.

**Vast Longings To Direct U_s_**

_"Don't touch me! Don't question me! Don't speak to me! Stay with me!"_

"This is a mess, Data. Fused neural net, depleted synthetic integration, fractal cascade anomalies, not to mention multiple cobalt node failures." Maddox said with a sigh.

"If you are tired there is no reason for you not to rest. You are under no obligation to assist me." Data said quietly.

They were working on his sister's inert frame and had been for the past six hours. It was tedious and consuming and so far had produced few results.

"No, I said I was going to help you in anyway that I can and I meant it." Maddox placed a hand on the small of his spine and bent backwards in an obvious effort to relieve pressure and tension there. A sight groan escaped his lips and Data placed his tools on the operating table and eyed the other man.

"I would rather you rest than make a costly error. Please."

Maddox again opened his mouth to protest but stopped before he started. "You're right." He conceded. "I'm spent." Moving away from the table he sat down on a nearby stool and exhaled deeply. "You don't mind if I stay do you? I mean if I ask you some questions it won't distract you will it?"

"I am capable or processing nearly 100 trillion operations per second. Carrying on a conversation with you will not pose a problem." Data said shortly.

"No, no of course not. I don't believe I've ever asked you, what is her name?"

"She does not have a name. She has a designation. She is 8 but it was my choice to call her Sister."

"She doesn't look like you."

Data delicately stripped a burned filament before carefully bonding a new piece of polymer to it.

"No, she does not. Why would she?" It was an odd question to pose as well as a strange thing to assume.

"So there are 8 of you then?"

"There were." Data said quietly.

"I'm sorry, is it painful to discuss?"

"Is it painful to speak about my 6 dead siblings as I work on the remainder of the 7th? Yes, Captain Maddox, it is." He answered harshly. What followed was an annoying but relentless pang of conscience. This was not right. Data took a deep steadying breath and after a moment began again. "I am sorry, Captain. I have no cause to be rude to you. You have been nothing but kind to me."

"It's all right Data, it is. I just want to understand you better, not just for Starfleet but for myself."

"Why? Why am I so interesting?"

"You are unique in all the universe, Data. There is still no one like you." Maddox answered with a smile that to Data seemed wistful and sad. "So you lived on Omicron Theta with your parents?"

"Yes, Doctor's Juliana and Noonien Soong."

"Cyberneticists?"

"To say the least." Data answered with a scoff.

"And were you um…where did you fall in birth order?"

"I was first." Data answered. The silence that followed caused him to once again look up from his work. Maddox was staring at him with a bit of surprise.

"What is it?"

"Nothing, nothing. Your brothers were like you?"

"They all resembled me, yes. Or rather we all resembled my father."

Maddox smiled. "His idea?"

"No, hers. I believe she intended it as a mockery to show how replaceble he was. It was not meant to be an honor."

"I see." Maddox responded the surprise in his voice was irksome to Data. Why would the man have feelings on the matter one way or another? Who was he to have knowledge confirmed or denied?

"Did they, your brothers I mean, have the same level of development as you?"

"They did not. They were made to be automatons. They did not know fear or pain. When you looked into their eyes all that you saw was… a void. But she was, _she is_ different."

"How so?"

"She is advanced, she has the potential to surpass even my growth. She was learning at an exponential rate, already experiencing rudimentary emotions. Data touched her cheek affectionately but her eyes simply stared empty and glassy towards the ceiling.

"Why after making so many androids unlike you would your father change course?"

"Again you assume it was my father, it was not."

"All right, why would Doctor T-…Doctor Soong make this change?"

Data wrinkled his brow at the slight gaffe but didn't pursue it.

"I do not wish to discuss this anymore, Captain Maddox. If you do not mind."

"No, not at all. But is it possible there is someone you would care to discuss this with."

"No one comes to mind."

"What about a counselor?"

"A psychiatrist? You want to send an android to a psychiatrist?" Data said with a smirk as he met Maddox's eyes. "There is a joke in there somewhere."

Maddox smiled. "Perhaps, but I think it might help."

"You think there is something wrong with me?"

"I think you're exhibiting all the classic signs of clinical depression. You're withdrawn, sullen, quick to anger, secretive."

Data tensed at the summation before firing back.

"Perhaps I am just not a 'good person'."

"Maybe. But that doesn't explain why I've heard you wake up screaming. And it doesn't explain why your sister there doesn't have a voice box."

Data stopped in his tracks, unable to meet Maddox's gaze. Maddox paused as well not speaking until he realized the android had no intention of filling the silence.

"Data I'd hardly be doing you a service to let you out into the world in the state you're in."

"I have yet to see any part of this world."

"Up until this point you haven't asked. As a matter of fact, I feel like stretching my legs. What do you say?"

"I am busy."

"You can take a break, at least allow me to show you around."

Data resumed his work and responded in a tone a bit more genial. "Am I the first artificial life form in this universe? You seemed quite adept at maneuvering through my internal system as well as my sisters. I find it hard to believe that I am one of a kind, despite what you say."

Maddox was silent, either lost in thought or simply choosing his words carefully.

"There are none like you in all the universe. Come on, Data, there's a lot I want you to see."

Data sighed, his work on his sister was wearing on him and the idea of leaving the lab did pique his curiosity.

"As you wish." He said placing his instruments down alongside his sisters body before reaching upwards to switch off the overhead light.

Maddox stood and stretched before beckoning Data to follow him. Through the lab, down the hall and out the main doors, past his room and Maddox's main office and suddenly Data found himself standing in a place he had never been. From this moment on, everything would be new.

Both men stepped into the waiting turbolift and Maddox gave the command; Main floor.

"This is actually a good time for the tour. It's late, very few classes, mostly catering to the Va'Zed. They're nocturnal. Other than that we should have the run of the place.

I think I mentioned before that Daystrom is a school and a research facility, as well as a lecture and symposium site. We have over a dozen annex's spread across the Alpha Quadrant and some of our areas of study include astrophysics, archeology and cybernetics.

"All of which you are in charge of."

"Yes, and at times that combined with maintaining my position on the Starfleet Academy Admissions board as well as squeezing in a bit of time for teaching makes all of this a bit much.

The lift reached its destination, the doors opened and they arrived in an atrium that was cool, fertile and serene. Data looked about feeling as though it had been ages since he'd seen something quite so alive. Omicron Theta had been struggling to return to health when last he saw it but these plants did not struggle, they grew thick and healthy and tall. Desiring tactile stimulation he reached out to touch a frond.

"There's more to see." Maddox said coaxing him softly.

"You said earlier that you were a Captain without a ship. Why is that?"

"Well I-" Maddox began before interrupting himself. "Those are the main offices, down there are 3 of our 24 lecture halls. To answer your question I joined Starfleet with the misguided idea I would be some sort of cowboy engineer. I thought I wanted adventure and excitement. But when it came down to it all I really wanted was to do my research in peace. I wanted to be here." He concluded with a smile.

Data nodded fully listening but also taking in everything around him. He had craved a new experience, a new location, new people and now here it was, and it frightened him a bit. So much space, so much room. How many people must fill this area everyday, how many voices!

_An agoraphobic android._ He thought to himself. _There is a joke somewhere in that as well_.

Although he knew the layout of the building from schematics he had seen he allowed Maddox to continue on their walking tour. It kept the other man talking which meant Data didn't have to.

"The second, third, fourth and fifth floors comprise the library. Most of the classrooms are on levels sixth through twelve. Oh, that's the gymnasium, I think there's a late night Parisee Squares match going on."

As Maddox had intimated earlier this did not appear to be a military facility, there were no drills, no guards on post. Rather than Spartan décor they were surrounded by artwork, unobtrusive ambient music played, as announcements scrolled across nearby walls alerting students of clubs, meetings, upcoming lectures and graduation reminders.

After all this, after few hints of deceit, why Data wondered was he still having such a difficult time trusting Maddox. Would he always feel this way, with everyone he was to meet in the future? Could no one be believed?

They walked on in silence before Data spoke again.

"I assume the research you wished to pursue, the research Starfleet did not allow time for was the creation of a stable positronic matrix."

Maddox nodded slowly.

"That's right."

"And as you told me I was unique in the universe I can assume you never reached your goal."

"No,…I never reached my goal."

"You have said that artificial life is respected here yet you also claim I am unique. For whom were these laws established?" Data pressed.

Maddox made no move to answer and Data sighed with frustration. More deception. More secrets.

"You could have dissected me. Taken me apart, advanced your own studies. I have seen your skill. My sudden appearance would have allowed you to achieve your goal, easily. I can scarcely imagine how you would have been lauded."

They crossed a fair amount of the main floor and were headed towards a set of doors that lead to the outside. Maddox had said nothing and indeed was walking a bit ahead of Data. He seemed preoccupied as the android followed him into the evening air. Both men found their gazes drawn upwards. As Data stared he noted it felt forbidden, almost dangerous to experience so much freedom and possibility. So many places he might go and see. So many memories he might be able to outrun with all that space. So many stars!

"I _would_ have been lauded, Data. If I sacrificed you for my work or tried to pass you off as… If I had done something like that and gotten away with it you have no idea what the result would have been.

Data turned to look at Maddox and found his face as dark as his tone.

"But once you start down that road there really isn't any way back. I am not that man anymore."

Data contemplated asking the man what he meant by "anymore" but then thought better of it. Old fears jutted to the surface of his mind. Perhaps he didn't want to know.

"Ready to go back?" Maddox asked suddenly. "It just occurred to me there's something I have to do. Something, I've been neglecting."

"Of course." Though he found the abruptness curious, Data refrained from saying anything.

They walked back to the turbolift, Maddox's pace not nearly so leisurely as it had been upon their arrival. As the doors opened Data stepped inside while his companion lingered.

"I thought I might head over to the cybernetics wing."

"You only recently told me you were 'spent'"

"That's true, but this can't wait. You know the way back?" It was clearly a statement not a query, they both knew he could easily find his way.

"Of course. Captain, are you all right?"

"Right as the mail."

Maddox pressed the button and the lift doors began to close, separating them.

"Think about what I said." Maddox offered softly and then he was gone.

Data returned to the lab and to his quarters. The outing had left him with conflicting emotions. Excitement at the possibilities that awaited him, guilt at the idea of enjoying them as much as he wanted to.

As he seated himself upon his bed an alert sounded from his work station. Closer inspection revealed it to be a message from Captain Maddox.

It was a rather massive file as it turned out. This was not a detailed broad study of history, but a specific time regarding a specific ship; the Enterprise.

Data quickly scanned through the information of the first five incarnations of the ship It was apparently a series of storied vessels, each with a rich history. In the first five articles there was only one section that was redacted, an incident that took place Stardate 4729.4. For the articles regarding the remaining two ships there was also minimal censorship but that was not what captured his attention. There were two words, two incredible words that appeared over and over again. Artificial Lifeform. In the articles for the Enterprise D and E there were countless references to him. It was described as a he and this he was no computer program. He had attained rank, commendations medals, he assumed command and been recognized for valor. As Data read on he became more and more fascinated by this nameless individual. So, it was true what Maddox had said, sentient yet artificial life was respected here and this was why. Data found himself smiling as the years passed on the screen and he learned more and more about the man. There was mention of a trial in the year 2365 to establish those very rights Maddox spoke about. The names of those involved were also curiously absent but for Data what mattered most was the outcome. This android was declared not to be the property of Starfleet. He read further, adventure after adventure, danger, perils, triumphs and tragedies. Then came the events of 2369, more than half a year ago. There was a sacrifice, a final one under circumstances that didn't fully make sense to him and which were heavily edited.

The disappointment was crushing. He was gone, destroyed and with him everything that had made him unique. So, now he knew. Though Data would be hard pressed to say he felt better for knowing. He turned the console off and stood up wondering what had precisely precipitated this generosity from Maddox. In the end he decided to simply not look a gift horse in the mouth.

As Data lay upon his bed he found himself wanting to know more, to know everything about this individual. There were gaps, crucial events were missing and not simply redacted. Why, he wondered. These scraps of information had only made him hungrier for a feast. He wanted to see where and how he lived, to talk to his superior officer, his friends, if he'd had any. And his creator! Who had managed this? Data quickly and succinctly arranged a list of questions he intended to present to Maddox the following morning. He decided to forgo his dream program instead choosing to review and re-review all he had learned since his arrival. He was both too excited and still too frightened to sleep.

The soft knock on the door startled Maddox and he glanced up from the PADD he had been staring dully at for the past half hour.

"Busy working late?" the woman asked with a grin.

"Reesa." He answered with a relieved smile of his own. "Never too busy for you. Come in."

She stepped into his office and seated herself in the chair opposite his desk. She was pink cheeked and light beads of perspiration dotted her forehead causing stray hairs that had freed themselves from her pony tail to stick there. In other words she looked incredible.

"Want some advice, Bruce?" she said leaning forward.

"Hmm?"

"Humans need to sleep."

"Look who's talking." He chuckled. "Why are you up?"

"Perfectly good reason as a matter of fact, I was a Parisee alternate. But we won and I managed to come out unscathed. Doesn't look like you're having as good a day."

"No, not quite."

"How is he?" Reesa asked with concern

"The same as he was yesterday and the day before that and the week before that and the month before that. I'm starting to come to the ugly conclusion that I'm fighting against fate here."

"Fate? I've never heard you talk like that."

"Recently my… 'faith' if you will has been both shaken and reinvigorated."

"This has something to do with that top secret project. Still under orders not to tell me?" she said reaching forward and taking his hand in her own. He found it comforting and familiar. They'd grown close over the years. She had probably been the first thing to ever distract him from his work. Tall, beautiful, wickedly brilliant, compassionate and both willing and eager to call him a pompous ass when he was, well, being a pompous ass. They has started off as colleagues, become friends, fumbled and failed as lovers and returned to where they began, good friends.

"I suppose the truth is I could tell you…" he began trailing off.

Reesa waited expectantly. "But…"

"I'd rather have you approach it relatively fresh."

"I'm approaching something?"

"I need your expertise." He said seriously.

"Not following."

"What do you know about the mirror universe?"

Reesa exhaled and cast her gaze upwards as she searched her memory.

"I've read a few papers discussing the resulting psychology of people who crossed, the consequences of seeing an alter ego, a life unknown to them that sort of thing."

"Read them again. Take some notes, do some research."

"That's what this is about, someone crossed? Someone important?"

"Very important. I'm really going to need your help, Rees."

Reesa gave him a sympathetic smile.

"You've got it, Bruce. I'll get started right now." Reesa said rising from her seat.

"Can I get you to come up to my offices, say tomorrow afternoon?"

She nodded "Definitely."

"We might need to take a trip to the morgue."

Reesa paused before nodding again. "Understood. Are you going to be all right, Bruce?"

"I think so, once I get the ball rolling, I think so." He said forcing a smile.

Reesa smiled in turn and headed towards the door before turning for a moment.

So what do I tell my sister. Leah's been bugging me because you-know-who has been bugging her. He's no fan of yours." She said with a half of a smile. "Can't say as I blame him, you were a real bastard back then."

"Back then? You flatter me. Don't tell her anything just yet."

"Ok. Just one more thing. This trip to your office tomorrow, is this for your project or is this a session for you?"

Bruce leaned back in his chair and rubbed his eyes.

"I'm not in need of any psychoanalysis at the moment, Dr. Brahms."

"Just checking, Dr. Maddox." She said and with a coy smile she left him alone with his work.


	4. Chapter 4

**So this one took awhile. A looooong while. I apologize for that. Number 1 - Life got in the way. I was trying to finish up my senior year of college, then came Grad school applications, then there was just so much Doctor Who to watch... blah, blah, blah. Number 2 - This Chapter was hard. it never quite felt right, or gelled, or came together in the perfect way I wanted, despite countless rewrites. Eventually, I knew I just had to let it go and finish it/post because that's the only way I could move the hell on. So here it is, hope you like it. As always reviews are both appreciated and salivated over. -Maribor  
**

* * *

_**Old Odd Corners Of An Empty Heart**  
_

_"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"_  
_"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat._  
_"I don't much care where-" said Alice._  
_"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat._  
_"-so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation._  
_"Oh, you're sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."_

Bruce Maddox entered his offices the next morning and found Data waiting anxiously for him. Both men eyed one another and it occurred to Maddox that they mirrored. Each looked weary, stressed, eager and hesitant.

"You don't look as if you've slept, Data." Maddox said rubbing the back of his own neck trying to loosen a kink.

"Nor do you, Captain. I have many questions to ask you regarding the file you sent me.

Maddox walked past the android silently before sitting down hard on a nearby stool. He had what he described to Reesa when he awakened her at around 0700 hours as a "panic attack" and asked her to come earlier. She had agreed and in fact would be there momentarily. Maddox was grateful, he had lost a bit of his nerve and as morning approached he was certain he couldn't handle it alone. Every time he attempted to talk himself out of this mounting worry, rational thought would break through. This was a big deal, a huge deal and Data was, though he hated to say it, leaning towards instability. How he would take this news was an enormous concern. What he would inevitably ask next would be even more difficult. Maddox dreaded having to speak to Picard again.

"Data, um…this is going to be hard. Really hard. I don't think you like me all that much now and I think you're going to like me a great deal less once this day is over. Perhaps not at all."

"I do not understand." Data said approaching him.

Maddox laughed a bit crazily. Suddenly the grief, the loss of 'his' Data bubbled to the surface and he saw this breach for what a grotesque twisting of fate it was.

"No, of course you don't. I've been up all night going over this...going over the reasons."

The door chime sounded and Maddox opened his mouth to speak but Data interrupted him.

"No! I am sorry but you must tell whoever that is that you cannot assist them now." Data raised his voice and pointed at Maddox to stress his point. "I require answers."

"I know, Data. And you're going to get them. Come in."

The door opened and in stepped Doctor Reesa Brahms. She was in uniform and looked a great deal more rested than Maddox had imagined possible.

"Bruce." She said with a professional nod before approaching Data. With her palm extended for a handshake she gave him a smile. If she was surprised or disbelieving she didn't show it. What Maddox did see was her mind quickly putting together the reasons he had requested she study all available crossover material.

"Data, pleased to meet you." She said. "I'm Doctor Brahms."

Data took her hand politely if not coldly. When he spoke he addressed Maddox.

"I assume she is a doctor of psychology and psychiatry. So you have gone against my wishes in this pursuit?"

Maddox did his best to not cringe from the wounded anger in Data's voice.

"That's right, Data I am and I think I can address some of the questions you might have. Would you have a seat?" she asked with a pleasant smile.

"My only questions center on the file Captain Maddox sent me yesterday evening."

"I understand." She said pulling up a chair first one for herself and then another for him. "Please, have a seat." She said again, her voice just as pleasant yet with an undeniable firmness.

Maddox watched warily as the android obliged.

"Now, there are a few things that Captain Maddox had asked we all three address. I'm here to help and to listen. Now if we continue your sessions they will most likely be one-on-one." Reesa crossed her legs and began to bring up information on her PADD.

"I do not believe there will be other sessions, Dr. Brahms. I am not in need of your services."

Maddox noted that Data spoke through nearly gritted teeth and he imagined the android must feel betrayed.

"Maybe you're right. Maybe after today we'll never see one another again. Maybe you don't need me. But right now Captain Maddox does, and I'm not leaving."

Data inhaled sharply through his nose, his posture changed and while he hardly looked agreeable there was a sort of resoluteness to his demeanor.

"Do you know of the file Captain Maddox sent me?"

"Yes, detailing the Enterprise D, E and F."

"And one specific life form." Data added.

Reesa nodded. "You're interested in this life form. What is it you want to know about him?"

Data faltered for a minute and glanced at Maddox as if for help.

"I feel it is important to know him, to research him. The reasons at the very least are twofold. Perhaps there is some advancement in his construction schematics that could aid in the reactivation of my sister and…he should not be forgotten." Data concluded pressing his lips together tightly.

Reesa turned to Maddox as she spoke. "It seems you and the Captain share a similar fear, not wanting him to be forgotten."

Data shifted his gaze to Maddox his eyes sharp and wide.

"You knew him?"

"I did." Maddox said with a nod, "For a great many years in fact."

"Another secret." Said Data quietly.

Reesa spoke again steering the conversation back.

"You feel a connection to him, to this android that you never met."

"I believe that I do, yes. Despite the inherent illogic nature of such an attachment."

"What if you discover in your search that he is nothing like you. What if this pursuit both emotionally and technologically failed to benefit you in any way? How would that affect you?"

Data furrowed his brow as he crafted his answer.

"I am uncomfortable dealing with the hypothetical, Doctor."

"How did you feel when you read about his death?"

"It upset me." He said his jaw clenching.

"Why?"

"Because it was the loss of something entirely unique, for reasons that still remain unclear to me."

"I understand that's its been a bit like pulling teeth to get information regarding your own past, Data. Captain Maddox said he's been trying for weeks to find out just what it is that makes you who you are."

"My past is irrelevant."

"Not to me." Maddox interjected. "And more than likely not to you either."

"It seems to me that you want to plunge headfirst into this distracting mystery while leaving certain stones of your own past unturned."

"What have you been telling her?" Data asked turning his head swiftly to gaze at Maddox.

"Nothing." Reesa assured him. "I am a professional, give me some credit. Honestly, Data if you were my patient, a regular patient I wouldn't approve of what we're going to do today. Its too much, it's too soon and you're not ready."

Maddox sighed audibly just as Data was about to open his mouth to protest. But Reesa held up a hand to silence them both.

"However, the UFPPA has different guidelines for how we handle crossovers."

"Crossovers? That is what I am?" Data asked.

"Yes, one of a small group of people who have migrated for one reason or another from the mirror universe to ours. At last count, there were all told somewhere around 300 to 350."

Maddox gaped at her. "I had no idea it was that many."

"No one does. It's not something that's publicized. My colleagues have decided that accelerated exposure and integration is the best treatment." Reesa quickly typed something onto her PADD and a moment later one near Maddox beeped. Picking it up he found a message from her stating; "I'm nixing the trip to the morgue." Trusting her judgment he nodded in response.

"As far as integration goes, I have accepted where I am. I have no desire to return from where I came and I also know it is a temporal impossibility. I grasp the historical differences between the past of my world and this one. I take it as fact. Just as I take my current state of existence in this world as fact." Data said all this is a testy sort of rush.

Maddox noted the professional demeanor drop from Reesa's face for a moment. She was no doubt comparing what she had heard and read of _his_ Data with the man that sat before them.

"You're so full of anger." She said with soft sympathy.

Data recoiled a bit, pressing his lips tightly together. After a moment he looked down at his hands and with a slight shake of his head responded.

"I am not angry. It would just appear that everyone has me at a disadvantage. I have simply tired of being treated as a child, Doctor, from whom things are kept for his own good." Data concluded softly and Maddox felt pangs of guilt.

"I'm not a crossover specialist, Data. If at any time during this you want to switch over to an expert that's fine with me." Reesa leaned forward again as she spoke, trying to engage the android on a more personal level. "The truth is, as I said earlier, we like to keep these things rather quiet. Honestly, Starfleet and Daystrom and most reputable scientists would rather this information remain privileged. Better that than having everyone running around setting off photostatic charges trying to rip a hole in this universe to get to the next one. Though I suppose given who you are, it will be hard to keep that secret much longer."

Data exhaled, his amber eyes meeting hers.

"Who am I?"

Maddox noted Reesa smile ever so slightly. He had known that she would like him.

"Data, what do you know about trans-world identity?"

Data's brow wrinkled and his face took on a contemplative look.

"I am unfamiliar with that term." He said finally.

Reesa nodded and continued.

"It's also known as counterpoint theory and it was postulated by an Earth scientist by the name of David Lewis and a few others in the mid to late 20th century. It goes beyond the idea that there are universes parallel to ours. It posits the idea of infinite, identical copies of any given universe."

Data nodded and to Maddox while he didn't appear the least bit confused he also seemed unable to make the leap. No, he corrected himself. Not unable. Unwilling. The theory naturally extended to a sort of object permanence but Data wasn't biting, in fact he seemed to pull back a bit from the conversation.

"Data, until it was proven otherwise, the prevailing viewpoint of scientists was that trans-world identity was impossible. It would require objects, people to have temporal parts in different locations. Having different existences yet never being wholly present in any of them. We now realize and have for some time that this constraint is false. Anything that can happen, does happen, Data. Has happened. Is happening, will happen.

It was slowly dawning on him, Maddox could see that. The obvious was creeping in upon him like sunlight beneath a bolted door.

"Bruce." Reesa said in a prompting way.

"The man…the android you read about, his name was… Data, his creators or his parents as he came to refer to them were Doctor Noonien Soon and Doctor Juliana O'Donnell Soon Tainer."

Data looking absolutely horrified began to shake his head slowly.

"No." he said softly but Maddox continued his voice growing stronger.

"He served aboard the Enterprise, he had family and friends and he died a hero's death. And he was my friend."

His voice broke on the last words, as fresh grief rose up within him. "My very good friend."

"I do not believe it."

Maddox scoffed with his own disbelief.

"He doesn't believe it." He said to Reesa.

"Bruce, calm down."

"Calm down? I actually think I've been remarkably calm through all of this." Anger and frustration suddenly propelled him from his chair. Data watched wordlessly.

"Computer, state the name of all androids who have ever served in Starfleet."

"There is only one officer who fits that criteria." The computer intoned.

"State his name, biography and service record."

"**STARFLEET PERSONNEL FILE: Data. ****Final Rank: Lieutenant Commander  
****Last assignment: Second Officer/Science Officer, _U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-E  
_****Full Name: Data  
****Date of birth: Permanently re-activated Feb. 2, 2338**

Initial Activation Unknown  
**Place of birth: Omicron Theta science colony  
****Parents: Created by Dr. Noonien Soong and Dr. Juliana O'Donnell Soong Tainer  
****Education: Starfleet Academy, 2341-45  
****Marital status: Single  
****Children: One, deceased  
****Quarters: Formerly, Enterprise-D: Deck 2/Room 3653  
****Date of death: 2379  
****Place of death: Destroyed with Reman ship _Scimitar in line of duty  
_****Service Awards: Starfleet Command Decoration for Valor; Starfleet Command Decoration for Gallantry; Medal of Honor, with Clusters; Legion of Honor; The Starcross**

"Enough." Reesa said forcefully.

"Computer, resume and continue!" Maddox shouted.

"Computer, belay that!" Reesa stated and the room momentarily sank into silence.

"God_damn_ it, Reesa! I will not have him sit there and shake his head in the face of all of this!" Maddox thrummed with anger, the emotion of the past weeks finally breaking through the surface. How could he sit there, looking so much like Data yet seeming to purposefully ignore what was going on.

"Captain Maddox, we're done for the day. You're temporarily relieved of duty pending an evaluation. That's on the record. Off the record. Bruce, get yourself together, get some rest, have a drink, run a holodeck program but get the hell out of here, now." Reesa commanded.

Maddox looked down at his hands and noticing they were shaking he balled them into tight fists. With a silent nod he headed towards the door. Turning just before he exited he addressed the android.

"I'm sorry, Data. I don't know what…"

Maddox trailed off as Data looked away offering no reply. Without another word he left.

Reesa fixed her gaze upon the android. He looked shell shocked.

"What are you feeling, Data. Tell me."

He opened his mouth but no words came out and it seemed for awhile he could only shake his head back and forth.

"I feel this is the most unlikely of all situations." He finally said.

"Why is that?"

"I cannot conceive of there being two of me."

Reesa smiled sympathetically.

"Its often that way, you're experiencing a common reaction. Some people are disturbed to find out they _don't_ have a counterpart."

"That would have made more sense."

"Why is that?" Reesa asked with a frown.

He appeared to grow emotional as he spoke.

"Because I am a machine. Constructed on a whim, an afterthought, an experiment. I am more unlikely than likely."

"Yet here you are. Questioning the probability of the situation is irrelevant. You sit here as fact, not speculation. You are Data. As was he."

She quickly typed something onto her PADD before turning the instrument and its screen around to face him. What he saw was a man, an android with his face, yet a face unlike he had ever seen before. He didn't resemble any of his brothers. Well of course he did in the essential ways, obviously an almost identical template had been used. If their measurements differed from this Data it was by microns. And still, this face didn't remind him of what he saw reflected back in the mirror. The imperceptible differences to the wear and tear of his synthetic skin, the slight lines around his mouth, the crinkles near his eyes, his eyes themselves.

"What do I do now?" he asked.

"Nothing more for today. I think we've all done enough." She answered with a sigh.

"I want to know more about him." Data said suddenly.

"I know, but first I want you to learn a bit more about yourself." Reesa paused before venturing on. "I'd like to learn with you, if you'll let me."

Data stood up and extended his hand, she took it in hers and they shook.

"We shall see, Doctor. If you'll excuse me, I wish to return to my quarters now."

"Of course." She said and Data felt her eyes upon him as he strode from the room.

Upon entering his he immediately opened the file that contained his log. Sitting at his bed he began to speak.

Personal Log Stardate 56983.9

I have…

He tried to continue but found no words forthcoming. No words seemed large enough, expressive enough to capture all that he was feeling. Instead he chose to address the tumult within in a rather unorthodox manner.

Father,

While I am aware it is folly to hope for things that cannot be, I find myself indulging in the practice all the same. At this moment, I wish that you were here. The world is not as we imagined. It as if I have fallen through a crack in time, perhaps through the Looking Glass. Just as I was adjusting to the idea of perhaps having a soul of my own I find that it is shared. Shared by a stranger with my face. I wish I could speak with you. I wish I could make use of your council. I wish we might embrace. I am so alone here and feel, perhaps irrationally that there is something even worse on the horizon. I have too many secrets and I feel the time is coming when I can no longer keep them silent…


End file.
